The time will pass anyways. You might as well enjoy it.
You have to keep going. This is your choice, but wake up and choose it every morning. If you can’t do it for you, do it for her—the little girl with shirley-temple curls and a squinting smile and hands full of paint and a heart full of love.
You have to let yourself be sad for the things you miss and mourn. Just don’t stay sad. Don’t let the sadness devour you whole while you sit in the bottom of its big whale belly. Lay with your grief and hold its hand. Learn to let go and get back up again.
Mother yourself: make your bed. Make some soup. Freeze a meal or two. Keep a box of cold medicine in the cabinet. Have extra toilet paper or paper towels or laundry detergent on hand, so when you run out, you’ll have your own back.
Don’t forget: you are the love of your own life. No one can ever love you like you can. Don’t give up that love. Treasure it. Treasure yourself.
Talk to your inner teenager. She was forgotten for so long and she needs you. She needs you to do her eyeliner. She needs you to love her.
Talk to your inner child. She’ll keep you joyful. She’ll think you’re beautiful. You look like her mom.
Kiss something everyday, even if it’s just your cats. Even if it’s just the back of your hand. Even if you blow it away for someone else to catch and it lands amongst the leaves. Trees need kisses, too.
You don’t need to be so hard on yourself. Think of your inner child: she’ll root for you in every race, even if you finish last. Even if you never cross the finish line. Even if it takes you forever. Because—
the time will pass anyways. You might as well enjoy it.
Georgia Riordan (she/they) is an MFA student at Rosemont College with a Writing BA from Ithaca College. They write primarily within the forms of poetry, flash, and lyric essays and within the genres and cross-genres of horror, magical realism, and creative nonfiction. You can find all their previous publications on their website: georgiariordan.com